CLOSURE

No matter there are three weeks to go until my film premieres in North Carolina--- I'm over it and as many days as I wish this Chapter in my life would just pass or hell, end happily ever after, it never feels like it quite does-- From recutting the film to struggling with the audio, to never quite finding a rhythm with the DVD extra stuff, to well the worst of all, being absolutely broke, disabling myself from affording a quick out by paying for a theatre to have a premiere, to paying for duplications, to paying film festival submissions-- Shit, from really doing anything that would allow this film to have the title: "my last" not "present" film-- I have been rendered useless of doing. Hence the reason I've been stretching out the completion, because really, what does it matter?-- Can't do anything with it anyway. 85% of the people involved with the production have seen it and my father, (the only guy I wanted to see it,) said nothing but, "good." So in the words of BB King, "The Thrill is Gone," so when can I put it behind me I ask myself? Well, an advance on the next project allows me to finish the last, so I guess I'll just keep borrowing from the project after to finish paying for the completion of the project before and I'll continue whoring myself doing music videos, commercials and the stuff I have gotten to the point of loathing to do to pay the rent and feed my kids. (Laymans: Never making a dime off the Movie Structure of Employment.)
But hey, the money allows me to buy the diesel fuel I need to blow this two year labor of love off my desk and into film festival orbit, (and more importantly afford me the resources needed to fulfill my duplication order and marketing campaign to let the baby bastard go.
Finally the designs my daughter and I haphazardly threw together on a rainy afternoon serve their purpose and I am 3 weeks and about $300.00 away from seeing my fifth film from port and off into the vast film festival sea. The demons will finally silence on February 21st. So long Phil Vag! So long Golf Shoes! So long suitcase! So long Jeopardy References BS!! And so long to that sunuvabitch film that damn near put me in the Looney House.